The water is off today.
I thought I had prepared for the usual water cut by setting the timer on my washer. Sad fact: I had this washer for over two years before figuring out it had a timer on it. In any case, I loaded the washer, set the timer and went to bed thinking I had outsmarted the water company. In the morning I knew that when I woke up, the clothes would be ready to hang out on the line. When the morning came, I expected to see the usual puddle of water next to the washer because the washer leaks. My heart sank when I realized there was no puddle. This could only mean one thing: the water is off today.
Bucket baths and dishwashers
We have always kept an extra barrel of water in case of water cuts. Honestly, a large water tank would be nice, but at the moment, installing a water tank is out of the reach of our pocketbook. The barrel system works well for us as we keep it full. We have learned to manage the house for a day or two with about 50 gallons of water. It’s amazing how one can learn, when necessary, to conserve water. I have learned to take a bath from a bucket and am, in fact, an expert at bucket bathing. I know how to use one bucket for a bath. But, I can also wash and condition my hair from the same bucket. That takes some mad conservation skills.
While waiting for the water to come on, dishes build in the sink and frustration levels rise. My family knows that dirty dishes are unacceptable to me. A dishwasher would be an amazing luxury. Whenever traveling abroad to visit family and friends, I silently ache to press the “start” button on anyone’s dishwasher. It’s amazing how hot water together with soap work a miracle. In about an hour, clean and (mostly) dry dishes emerge from the machine. I try to keep dishwasher thoughts to myself but now that I’ve published them online, I guess it’s out there in the open.
If I were so blessed to have a dishwasher, it would sit silent, as my washer sits silent, because…the water is off today.
Enjoy while the water is off
Life on this side of the world is inconvenient, uncomfortable, and unpredictable. Yet, it’s in this strange place that I fit. I’m sure I present as an enigma to friends and loved ones whose lives are very different from mine. I even find it difficult to explain myself to myself. Why do I enjoy this life so much? How can I enjoy it when the water is off today?
There have been times over the years that I have tried to fit in with my normal counterparts in far-off lands (far-off to me anyway). Whenever any of our children have married and we’ve traveled to attend the wedding, I’ve done my best to scrub up and look the part of either the mother of the bride or groom. Everyone knows that no matter how nice a dress I might wear or how good the salon has made my hair look for the day, my simple side lurks close to the surface.
The high heels will make my feet hurt and will be kicked to the back of the closet after the wedding. They will never be worn again. Unlike everyone else, my lipstick (itself several years old) won’t be freshened up and I won’t give a thought to checking my makeup. And, embarrassingly, I don’t know how to dance. Consequently, when it comes time for any special dance between mother/son or together with my husband, I am sorely deficient.
Another sad fact: Once, when we had family pictures taken by a professional photographer, I forgot to have my nails done. At one point, the photographer had me stand behind Jamie, hugging his shoulders. This pose showed off my unmanicured, unpolished nails for all to see. There has never been a more authentic depiction of who I am before or since. Why try to repeat perfection?
The water is off and I don’t understand
I love visiting family and friends. If all goes according to plan, we’re preparing for another transatlantic flight to see family for Christmas and New Year. I’m so looking forward to it! Now that we have grandchildren, we have even more reasons to visit (and spoil them a little bit). Having grandchildren is a little bit of heaven on earth. I wish I could enjoy them more.
Yet, it is inevitable that the ache to return home to Africa will draw me back to where I fit. This, when separating from the children and grandchildren, is when I don’t understand myself the most. Going back to where the water is off, it is where I belong. Long ago I learned the lesson to accept who God made me to be and accept the assignment He has put on my and my husband’s life. While I learned the lesson, that doesn’t mean that I enjoy every part of what I am called to do. There is a suffering that accompanies the calling. There’s a price to pay when you accept to be who God makes you to be.
Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, all those who have left houses, brothers, sisters, mother, father, children, or farms for me and for the Good News will get more than they left. Here in this world they will have a hundred times more homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children, and fields. And with those things, they will also suffer for their belief. But in this age they will have life forever.”
Mark 10:29,30 NCV
Live without apology
As painful as it is to leave, I inevitably find myself climbing a plane, holding Jamie’s hand tightly, and flying back to where I find my work fulfilling. Back to where I make sense. It is in Africa that God taught me to live as He made me to be. I’ve slowly learned to let myself be who I am and live without apology where God has placed me. Does it make sense? Will everyone embrace the call? Likely not. However, surrendering to the call is all I know how to do.
We’ve lived this life so long now that most of our family and friends understand that, for us, there’s no turning back. A compelling reason to live this way is precisely for the sake of our family, our children, and our grandchildren. It is for them we hope that the testimony of our lives will give them reason for them to live authentically. To live in obedience to God’s call on their lives, whatever that may be.
What will we do when God answers this prayer
If you’re struggling, as you read this, to either let someone go and do the will of God (not only overseas but anywhere) or to do the will of God yourself, please consider the impact you make on others in your reaction. Many of us have prayed the prayer for laborers to be sent into God’s harvest. What will we do when God answers that prayer by either sending us or someone we love far from us?
After these things the Lord appointed seventy others also, and sent them two by two before His face into every city and place where He Himself was about to go. Then He said to them, “The harvest truly is great, but the laborers are few; therefore pray the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest. Go your way; behold, I send you out as lambs among wolves.”
luke 10:1-3 NKJV
The work is hard enough, we will encounter the wolves among us as we go. As hard as it is, fighting the wolves in the field is easier than fighting wolves at home. It’s time to surrender. For me, part of that surrender brought me here, where the water is off today.
