When mustaches were all the rage

When I first met Jamie, my heart skipped a beat. I met him in the early 1980s, so mustaches were all the rage. Jamie had a mustache, and I thought he looked so handsome. I described his smile as one that made me blush when directed at me. He wore the classic men’s cologne at the time, Halston©️. The cologne’s scent seemed to pull me to follow whenever he walked past me.

I guess it’s obvious that I fell hard for him.

A model romance

Ours was a model romance. The girl crushed on the unattainable guy, who then fell for her. They married and lived happily ever after. Sometimes, we had to negotiate long and hard for the happily ever after part, but we managed. And we’re still managing. The art of negotiating requires practice. It also demands humility. You learn these skills in the proverbial “School of Hard Knocks” of life.

That means learning what is and isn’t essential to fighting about. And, for the most part, there is little worth arguing over. We can go back and forth about give-and-take in a marriage and still fail to come to a resolution. Look away if your significant other has left the towel on the floor for 10 years. It’s not worth the argument. I’m sure you’ve left some things around they would rather not see. These little irritations aren’t worth the sweat equity put into an argument. Turn your head and move on.

Guidelines when mustaches were all the rage

When we were young, and mustaches were all the rage, couples were given guidelines to make their relationships work. They were pretty common sense. We were encouraged to have a weekly date night. We shouldn’t use absolute words like “never” in an argument. Additionally, we shouldn’t go to bed angry.

If we argued on a Sunday, it sometimes felt like I didn’t go to bed until Tuesday. 😅

Time has taught me to conserve my energy for things that matter. And being angry is not something I do not want to waste my energy on. It took me too long to learn this lesson. Life in my 20s would have been much easier if I had learned “to let it go.”

Newlyweds, and then life changed

As newlyweds, we led a “Young Marrieds” home group. Looking back, it was pretty amazing. Our little townhouse would host 10+ couples for a weekly meeting. Many ended up sitting on the stairs while we, too young to know anything ourselves, led the group. We had fun, God showed up, and lives were changed. Those were amazing days!

Life changed, and so did our geography. We moved to Africa and began planting churches, opening schools, running feeding programs, and more. Sometimes, we were too busy to remember the lessons of spending time together. The kids needed to go to school, the church required attention, and endless administration duties pulled on us.

But God was faithful in keeping us on track during those busy years of raising our family. Because we both loved Him, He was sure to get us focused whenever we got too busy. I’ve learned another valuable lesson along the way. God loves those He has sent us to serve and He also loves us. God has meant our lives to be lived in joy, not only in work. Life is a gift to enjoy, and love in our lives is a gift from God.

The gift of love

Time passed, and mustaches fell out of fashion. Jamie’s mustache gave way to a goatee, which later gave way to a full-on beard. The length of the beard varies these days, but I can see the mustache hidden in the beard. The same one who made my heart flutter and dance with the smell of Halston©️ cologne is there.

What a gift it is to love.

For all the spelling police out there, I know you might be questioning my spelling of “mustache.” There are two ways to spell the word. According to the Oxford Dictionary©, it can be spelled “mustache” or “moustache.”