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Shake it off, how to cope when you get mixed signals

I need to shake it off; I know that not everyone will like or appreciate me in this world. That’s normal, right? In my mind, I know this, but my heart doesn’t like it. Not one bit. It’s a sad reality. I’ll run into people who don’t like me. I’ve heard it said that people are fickle. One day, they’ll name a street after you; the next, they’ll chase you down that same street. They are sending mixed signals. As I’ve grown older, it’s become easier to accept, laugh about, and shake it off. But there are still times when it stings, especially when the rub of disapproval comes from someone or a group of people you wouldn’t have expected it to come from.

I’ve lived as a foreigner in different countries for most of my life. In every place, there have been wonderful people who have embraced me and my family. Also, there have been those who haven’t been so friendly or accepting in every place. And I find it hard when this happens. Now, I take this unfortunate reality and hope that for those who don’t like me, my presence will be, at the very least, tolerated.

Inevitably, the sensitive one

I don’t know if you have ever done a personality test. A new one appears on the horizon every decade or so, and I will usually be convinced to see where I might fit in the latest test. Inevitably, I end up on the sensitive side of the spectrum. My favorite one of these tests has been the Enneagram (if you’re interested and follow the Enneagram, I’m a 2w1). It’s pretty accurate and helped me understand myself a bit more. Jamie (my husband) is a 7w8 and has also appreciated it. Our marriage has grown just by learning how the other “ticks.”

Rejection stings, but it doesn’t have to lead me like a person leads a horse with a bit and bridle. Nowadays, I’m pretty comfortable in my skin. Some of that comes from learning more about myself. But I think some of being more comfortable comes with the blessing of age. While I don’t like some of the gray hairs I’m seeing, I do like the perspective age has given me. It’s becoming easier to shake it off.

Lesson learned? Shake it off

crowd of people on street opposing politics shake it off
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I read this morning that Paul faced this same fickleness of humanity in Lystra. In Acts 14, the people initially loved his message and miracles (see verses 8–18). The people wanted to worship him as a god. But, in the next verses (see verses 19–20), the same people stoned him and left him thinking he was dead. However, he got up and went on to the next city.

Lesson learned? You need to get up and shake it off. People are fickle, but God remains the same. That’s one of the many reasons I love Him. He’s reliable and unshakable. He loves me no matter what and won’t send mixed signals.

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Lea

I'm a career missionary in Africa serving since 1987 with my husband and family. My husband and I have four children, three of whom are married, and two grandchildren. Life is good.

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